Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Swirly is NOT happy darlings!

Well darlings, as you would all be aware Swirly requested applications from people who were interested in joining the wonderful and talented team of writers here at Fashion Victim. With menial tasks being beneath her station, Swirly left it up to Stephanie and Ayami to filter the applications and select the best writers. BIG mistake darlings. Swirly was expecting to find that all sorts of fabulous people like ZsaZsa Withnail and Celebrity Trollop had been chosen to write for her, but oh no, just look at what those two silly girls have dredged up.

'Kota Buck, who isn't even bothering to use her real name here, is a KNOWN criminal. Swirly has photographic proof darlings, thanks to the mugshot below which was kindly provided by the Imogen Police. And Swirly thought Imogen was such a nice sim. 'Kota's illegal activities include running a speakeasy called Buckie's House of Hooch which is home to all sorts of unsavoury characters. Swirly was also shown some photographs of Dakota which were semi-pornographic and highly offensive, and which certainly will not be published here.

As if things couldn't get any worse, next they bring in Lizardbeth Lulu, who is a green lizard. Swirly will tolerate furries to a certain extent as long as they are cute and cuddly, but LIZARDS?? Disgusting darlings. Now please cover your eyes and try not to look at the following photo lest it scar you for life.

Next we have the appalling Karl Kleiber, a psychopathic militant revolutionary whose unsavoury activities include trying to spread the communist word in Gor. Karl is pictured here during a brutal and unprovoked attack on poor innocent alien mutant furries. Swirly can only hope that Karl never posts here, his dress sense is terrible.

But Swirly has saved the worst for last. Furiae Blackthorne is a child. A DEAD child. I am sorry darlings but there is just no place for this kind of thing on Fashion Victim, or anywhere else for that matter. Swirly does not want her publication to become some kind of breeding ground for necrophiliac age players. And Swirly doesn't care that Furiae is wearing Simone in this photo; fine, the child may have at least some fashion sense but will you just LOOK at her?

And please nobody, NOBODY, even mention the homeless person to Swirly......... ever.