Thank God for Maternity Wear

While you're all busy photoshopping your pictures just to be praised on flickr, and pretending to be afk working hard on your latest AMAZING designs (We all know you're cybering, stop pretending that you and your dildo aren't BFF.), something tragic has happened! I have become knocked up again with yet another burden. Last time I was knocked up the heavens heard my prayers and made the abortion a success. Now, it may be a little too late to abort the burden, but I know plenty of cannibals (Swirly Cyclone) who are more than willing to rid me of such awful things; a baby and responsibility! Now in order to forget all my worries, I decided retail therapy would do the job. The only place I could think of was Artilleri because it's my favorite maternity wear store, ever! Antonia is good to us knocked up hookers.

A cute yellow shirt exposing those knockers and an easy access skirt for grown up time on the go.

The skirt is yellow like a banana. I love bananas! Especially when my close friends are borrowing my dildo or husband. :D

Oh, this is just a treat for all you married men out there not getting any satisfaction from your ugly wives. IM me and we'll discuss rates. ;)

Clothes: artilleri

Skins: La Sylphide

Earrings: KCD

Hair: Armidi

An early Christmas gift

Hello all. It's been awhile since I've treated you to hot, steamy, sexy pictures of myself. Since Christmas is very soon, I decided to take time away from my adult movie making occupation, and go shopping, and take some pictures of what I bought.

( That smile is reason #393,927 your girlfriend is jealous of me! )

Of course I went to the leading store in Maternity wear, Artilleri. =) Antonia is known for her exclusive store just for us knocked up hookers, so it was a given that I would go there. I couldn't afford all the lingerie because I didn't get my bonus from work. I didn't get my bonus from work because I refused to protest against women getting abortions. As you know, I love abortions! I might go to a clinic right after I'm done treating you to these sexy pictures. ;)

There's a bunch of new stuff at Artilleri! ( Mostly super new to me because I've been so busy googling 2 Girls, 1 Cup..and reenacting the scenes with my mother in law. ) But who honestly cares about dresses, shirts, and pants in the winter time when there's brand new lingerie!?

( Aren't Mr.Boner and I adorable together? )

Random note: Being knocked up is not a beautiful thing, but I certainly make it beautiful. This burden of mine and an unknown sperm donor should be blessed that I am carrying it.

But on a bright side, I know this is a bit early, but I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas. Oh, I forgot I have to say "Happy Holidays" because someone out there will get all offended. ;)

artilleri

Cinnamix: Punk'd Goth'd Stoopid!

Hey bitches! Its me and I have finally made my return to da' EffVee. I know, I know, you have all missed me so much. My dear fans, I have decided to bring something new to you and it is called "Cinnamix". (Cinnamix © has been copyright by Cinnamon Coffee. Any unauthorized use will result in a swift kick to da' nutz!) Cinnamix is my way of taking some of the best things in Second Life fashion, mixing them up and spewing them into a beautiful vomit creation, like when you stir up Fruity Pebbles, Moutain Dew and Velvetta Cheese.


If you're like me, you have herpies... but also you tend to mix and match your outfit together. Combining various items into what you and I call style. Many of what you call "sluts" tend to do this, but it may only be panties and a tattoo but thats not a complaint. Heck, I hope it starts a fashion revolution! Viva NO CLOTHES in Second Life!


This first Cinnamix is based on all those Goth wannabe whores, damn I love em so much. All with too many daddy issues and just beggin' for some luvin'. Good thing Dr. Coffee gives them a shoulder or lap to cry on. This is also the perfect little outfit to get ready for the upcoming spooky and evil holiday that isn't that far away. Yes, I am speaking of Thanksgiving.


I get the heebie jeebies just thinking about all the poor turkey's that run around beheaded. Those damn pilgrims took my land and raped and pillaged stuff. I honestly don't know what pillaged means, but it just sounds naughty. Yes, I am 1/68th Native American. My Indian name is "One Who Spreads Eagle". First we have a great vest from Refuge, even comes with flexi prim ties for the back. With a little tug for quick release. Oopsie, the girls got out ;)


Keeping it back to the basic black and white, typically of most goth children. Keeping it evilish, you got great Skull Armwarmers from Canimal. Her stuff is always great to mix, even if it is just her selection of clothes. Continuing with the skull theme, you got a great little Skull Purse from Artilleri. Das Boots are also from Shiny Things... Great for matching up with a number of different outfits... or just walking around in your panties and tattoos. Yes, VIVA REVOLUTION!


Rounding the rest of the mix up we have this little skirt part of Caliente Express's Rosa Outfit and Mischief's Insubordinate Outfit set with these great striped stockings. And thats how you Cinnamix! Remember ladies, be careful on what you wear and how you do it. Especially if your planning to take it off for me later ;) Till next time, and hopefully it won't be months later... xoxo my bitches!

• Vest: Refuge
  
• Armwarmers:Canimal
• Purse: Artilleri
  
• Boots: Shiny Things
  
• Skirt: Caliente Express
  
• Stockings: Mischief
  

Now a little image to show I support the arts! Yay for trumpets!

A perfect Maternity Dress!

Hello! It's been awhile and I know you knocked up hookers feel I've abandoned you and left you to dress horribly. I'm almost sorry! Well, unfortunately, I am on a budget so instead of purchasing all the new maternity wear from artilleri, I could only afford to buy the most perfect maternity dress my hooker eyes have seen. ( My hubby is mad at me because I refuse to get down on all fours like some dog so he's not giving me any money! I have to work for myself! Can you actually believe that!? ) Anyways, this dress is just perfect for me, and may look decent on you as well.

Just look how I glow in it!


Sorry this is so short. As I said above, I actually have to work for myself until I find a real sugar daddy or until my hubby stops being mean and demanding such things.

Go to the best Maternity store in Second Life:

artilleri

FABULOUS New Releases from artilleri

Anyone who knows Swirly would be well aware that Antonia Marat is Swirly's all time favourite designer. Antonia's little store artilleri sells the most fabulous old fashioned clothing; true period pieces which are perfect for fans of historical fashion. The latest releases from artilleri are the divine Roaring Gwen dress, which Antonia says was inspired by a person called Gwen Stefani, and the adorable Leo Flats shoes. Like everything at artilleri, these items are historically accurate, so Swirly decided to model them in 19th century Caledon for you. As you can see, she fits right in to her surroundings, thanks to Antonia's keen eye for detail.

The Roaring Gwen dress in pink is perfect for a spot of afternoon trainspotting. The Leo Flats come with red, black and pink ribbons. Can you guess which colour ribbons Swirly is wearing here?
The Roaring Gwen dress comes in six colours, and black is just one of them! Here is Swirly wearing the black dress in a stranger's house.
Swirly loves this dress in green, it goes perfectly with these depressing ruins on a barren moor.
The Leo Flats come in a pack of 3 for only 180L; and the Roaring Gwen dresses are 200L each, or 650L for a fat pack with all six colours. Bargain darlings!

*smooches*

Swirly ate my baby.

Hello, hello. I've been on hiatus for quite awhile now, and I will tell you the reasons why. As you all know I was a very pregnant whore! Well, one day that burden of mine just popped out of nowhere and I was no longer pregnant. IT was a girl. I named her Stephanie after my former ex lover and hated wife, Stephanie Misfit. Little Stephanie was my pride, my life, my burden, my world.

Well Little Stephanie was taken away from me! My obese sister, Swirly, ate my baby. She thought it was a giant size hot dog thingy ma bob perfectly made for her. I was in shock and devastated.

A whole entire day passed and I was still depressed over this inevitable loss. But luckily for me, my husband Bing, came back from one of his "business" trips, and he planted another one of his seeds in me.

I soon found out I was pregnant again and boy was I happy. Upon hearing I was pregnant again I decided I was going to need some NEW maternity wear. So I went over to Artilleri, my favorite store that sells Maternity wear. I bought this cute, white hoochie mama top that shows of my *NEW* burden, and even some scandalous tattoos. Also I got these cute lil' black jeans. I just look adorable, I really do. And you CANNOT tell me otherwise...because...you wouldn't want to make me depressed and make me lose another baby, would you? ^_^ Love and peace for all!

Clothes from Artilleri

Shoes from Shiny Things
Hair from ETD
Earrings from Paper Couture
Tats by Novi Gadsby

Fashion Victim's Best of Hair Fair 2007

Hello dears, Swirly here with some of the most fabulous styles from the best designers at Hair Fair this year. Dakota and Stephanie will also give you their opinions on what's hot, but you just listen to Swirly, wouldn't want you making a serious fashion faux pas darlings! Of course there were many more marvelous designers featured at the Hair Fair than Swirly could possibly show you here, but she couldn't buy everything darlings, she doesn't have a husband with payment info on file!

ALLURE BY SPARKLE SKYE

Swirly LOVES Dolly in French Vanilla from Allure. This style has it all darlings, a gorgeous ribbon with pretty flowers attached, side swept bangs and those lovely fluffy alpha textures. Just divine!

ARMIDI

A new hair designer premiering at Hair Fair this year is Armidi, brought to us by those clever people at Elephant Outfitters. There's some lovely hair for the boys, but alas, only one style for the girls so far. But what a style it is! The Bombshell lives up to its name, and Swirly just knows she will have men with payment info on file falling at her feet when she wears this hair.

ARTILLERI

Stephanie Misfit looks quite smart in the Mariya hair from artilleri. It would have looked much nicer on Swirly though.

Poor Dakota Buck looks like she is making a sad attempt to return to her childhood in the Dallas hair from artilleri. What next dear, school uniforms?

AVEDA

Aveda is a new range of realistic hair brought to us by ETD for Aveda Institutes, and darlings, everyone is just raving about it! In the picture above, Stephanie is wearing Long Wavy in Amber, Short Crop in Coffee, and Long Flip in Champagne. That's from left to right darlings, not all at once, that would be silly!
Of course, Stephanie is overshadowed by Swirly wearing the daring Short Bob in Champagne. Only a woman of substantial beauty like Swirly can get away with a style as blunt and edgy as this, which is why Swirly recommends that YOU don't even try.

CURIO

Swirly loves the sleek, shiny and very sexy Gala II from Curio. Very shiny textures and super flexi darlings! Not a look every girl can pull off, but Swirly manages it effortlessly.

CURL UP AND DYE SALON

Dakota is wearing Joan in Auburn from Curl Up and Dye Salon. She almost looks pretty!

Also from Curl Up and Dye is Lucy in Red. Doesn't Swirly look adorable in this?

GLAMOROUS LADIES

Swirly is wearing LadyGlam in Honey from Glamorous Ladies. Swirly hadn't come across this designer before and was delighted to see that someone is finally bringing some true style and glamour to Second Life!

KIN KEIKO

Stephanie is wearing Kaoru in Brown from Kin Keiko. This style is slightly reminiscent of the movie There's Something About Mary, though Swirly can't put her finger on exactly what it is that reminds her of it.

NAUGHTY

Swirly just oozes class in Imaginary by the delectably divine Lost Thereian. This style is both playful and sophisticated, isn't Lost marvelous? And ohhhh so handsome too!

Of course, Stephanie had to try to outdo Swirly by buying Pierce, a special design by Lost, with 100% of proceeds going to Locks of Love. You get 48 gorgeous colours for only 2000L, and the warm and fuzzy feeling that comes from helping others. Isn't Lost just the BEST for giving all the proceeds from the sale of Pierce to poor little children who have no hair? And Stephanie dear, just because you purchased a special charity hairstyle doesn't mean you CARE, don't think we can't see right through you darling!

NYLON OUTFITTERS

Dakota is wearing Repressed Inner Child from Nylon Outfitters. Dakota dear, just because you have a bizarre obsession with connecting with your "inner child", it does NOT give you permission to pick your nose during fashion shoots! Swirly doesn't know if this kind of thing is considered acceptable on other blogs, but it certainly won't be tolerated on Fashion Victim.
Dakota is in our faces yet again, this time wearing the rather oddly named YO GINA hair from Nylon. Really darlings, you would think Dakota could have at least bothered to run a brush through this hair before modelling it here.

OLD GRAVY

Dakota is modelling Yuppie in Brown by Old Gravy. Yes darlings, only Dakota Buck could make a glamorous hairstyle like Yuppie look somewhat, well, trashy. Once again, something that would look much better on Swirly. Why these girls even bother is a mystery.........

SINSATION

This is Jem from Sinsation . Swirly just loves this soft, fluffy and modern style in the Mocha Highlights shade, it makes her look like a soccer mom who just slid out of bed after a hot night between the sheets.

*smooches*

This Trashy Life

Swirly seems to have already given me a fairly decent introduction so I don't really see a need for me to give the obligatory self-intro. I am Dakota Buck and you should already know the rest.

In Second Life, where anyone can have all the most fabulous clothes, it would be easy to assume that those with the best clothes will be the best dressed. At a glance it's fairly easy to see that this is not so. Nothing's stopping you from buying every item ever blogged (congrats' if you can, but try to do it without ending up in jail – the food isn't too crash hot) but this exercise is close to pointless if you can't rock your look.

There's a trashy craze emerging from our little virtual fashion world, now this is not the Club Arsheba escort service kind of trashy, this is fierce and colourful and inspired by trashylife.com. Items are being released by content creators like Arbel Vogel (Winter Moon) and Pandora Jensen (PanJen) as the charge is lead by the perma-fierce Ms. Satine Dot (Old Gravy). These girls have got it, but unfortunately simply wearing their stuff doesn't mean that you do. Exploring your trashy side can be a dangerous business for the junior fashionista when you take into consideration how easy it is to look like a dirty dirty cumdumpster in sl – not a challenge to be taken lightly. I've put together some hints for trying out this trend before you start ripping your tutus, tanks and tights.

Just say no to hooker heels. You know the one's I'm talking about, Trashiness calls for some impressive stilettos but once you cross that line into stripper shoe territory you'll be filling in a GOL (Goddess of Love) application form in no time.

Ban the bling and other faux-glamorous jewelry. If your body is blingin' you have no right to be within a four sim radius of me or anyone else for that matter. There really needs to be a separate blingtard section as with the smoking and non-smoking sections in real life. Relating this back, the other prevalent jewelry sin is that hideous white/silver texture, accessories crafted from this will not work with your trashy life look (or any other time while I'm on the topic). If you want to work this look try brightly coloured plastic - like hat you used to wear as a little girl. Get multiple bangles, the type that clack together when you move, and link them together. Layer your necklaces. Mismatch your earrings.

Mix and match until you find the trashy look that works for you. Be theatrical and glam.
Scum
Scum Set from Winter Moon.
Vogue Skin (Last Call-Babydoll) from Last Call.
Custom Tattoo from Bellish Ink
Trash (Brown Streaks) from Old Gravy.
Trashville 5 Star Boots from Jeepers Creepers.
Fairy
Sticky Fairy from Winter Moon.
Trasher Skin from PanJen.
City Blossom Set from Earthtones Boutique.
Shit Kicker Boots from SiniStyle.
Guns Tattoo from Lush.
Christina (White Frosted) from ETD
Wrist Wrap Ribbon Watch from Tickled Pink.
Daring
Dare Pumps (Teal) from Shiny Things
Snakeskin Wrap Belt (pink/blue) from Shiny Things.
Dark Sticky Fairy Tank from Winter Moon.
Lamina Bikini Top from Winter Moon.
Leopard Pants from artilleri.
Honey (Brown October) from artilleri.
Ganguro Skin from PanJen.
Buncha Heart Bangles (Pastels) from boing fromage.
Retro Heart Earrings from Kitty's Rampage.
Winged Heart from Yummy.
Body Graffiti (Suicide Girls) from Canimal.

1. Buncha Heart Bangles (Pastels) from boing fromage.
The buncha heart bangles by elka Lehane are one of my favourite accessories whether I'm trashily dressed or not. They come in several colour combinations and can be teamed with most outfits.
2. Wellies (Blue) from Jeepers Creepers.
3. Dare Pumps (Teal) from Shiny Things.
Proof that you can be glam and sexy without the use of hooker heels.
4. Elizabeth Button-up Boot from Lassitude & Ennui.
5. Cassette Earrings from Happy Junk.
I'm a BIG fan of Happy Junk. There's not too much in the store at the moment but what is there is fantastic. Natalie Defiant does some rad tiny prim-work.
6. RaGe Gloves from SiniStyle.
Trashy is fierce. The RaGe Gloves by Krius Misfit are a great way to get that hard edge without changing out of your fairy wings.

So remember:Photo by Menno Ophelia.